Policewoman’s wedding crumbles when she and the Xoco army fail to capture the bride

Will you marry me?
Photo courtesy of Sunisa

 By Persephone Bolero-Trenton

AMAZON — While the jungle is full of stories of love and romance, not all endings are happy.

Such was the case for Sunisa Minoptra, a member of the Xoco tribe and sometimes police sergeant, who was pining for Syrissa Broono. Sunisa had planned a lovely ceremony for herself and Syrissa, except one little problem — Syrissa wasn’t willing to be wed to the cop. 

Sunisa had cute invitations made for her wedding.

 

Prior to the big day, however, Sunisa was confident she would be joined in unholy matrimony with her love interest.

“Well, Syrissa doesn’t go that way yet, but I'm sure she'll come around,” Sunisa told the Sun.

On the big day, Sunday, there seemed to be some dispute over the prospects that Syrissa would give her hand in marriage.

“Are you kidding? Syrissa wants nothing to do with that lesbian,” Stephen Shieldmaiden, a member of Chaos, told the Sun before Sunisa and the Xoco warriors arrived to capture Syrissa and convince her to marry Sunisa. “That woman is off her rocker if she thinks its going to happen. Over my dead body, Syrissa wants nothing to do with her. Its just a corrupt, jealous cop talking don't you know?"

As word of the approaching Xoco army reached the Chaos base, Syrissa was, as nervous brides often are, complete inebriated. When asked if she would be agreeing to the marriage, she expressed some reluctance.

 

Syrissa, nervous on her wedding day, gets thoroughly wasted.
Photos by Persephone Bolero-Trenton

 

"Bah, Marriage is a fairytale. I’ve no need for fairytales,” the woman told the Sun, her words slurring. She added that she did not want to be married to Sunisa.

The wedding might have turned out better for Sergeant Minoptra, but the Xocos, who had planned to be Sunisa’s bridesmaids, ended up in the Chaos cells. Syrissa, for her part, remained in her room, where she watched the battle that ensued in the name of capturing her heart.

Sun Publisher Persephone Bolero-Trenton entered the warzone, protected by her husband, local bush pilot Leslie Trenton. Trenton, who had spent 25 years in Africa, had not been in a combat area in many years.

Will you, Syrissa, make me the happiest woman in the Amazon?

 

Bolero-Trenton was wounded during the battle when she took friendly fire from Silvia, a Xoco. Mr. Trenton carried his incapacitated wife to a safe area, while she continued to shoot photos.

Sunisa ended up a captive in the room with Syrissa, and she pleaded with her love interest to reconsider the marriage. With Xoco army neutralized, Sunisa had little leverage to convince Syrissa to change her mind, and Syrissa even declined to date the sergeant, saying it would only mislead her. 

 

Rejected and bloodied, Sunisa addresses the party.

 

“You broke my heart!” Sunisa said, sobbing. She did, however, accept that the marriage wasn’t going to happen. She agreed to make a statement to her wedding party.

“It's over sisters! There will be no wedding. I shall remain single and a virgin* for the time being,” Sunisa told her bridesmaids, tears streaming down her cheeks. 

The bridesmaids await the reception and cake that never happened.

 

Sunisa and the other Xoco returned to their camp, where they likely laid around drinking the day away. No word yet if Syrissa will be considering any future marriage proposals, forced or otherwise, but for now, the Chaos warrior remains single. 

*Fact check: False.